Today was our ward fast for Tyler. We are hopeful that our will is in line with God's will. We are praying that he will recover. I received a discouraging email from someone with the same type of tumor. She said that most tumors get central necrosis (or death) when they grow very large because the center becomes farther from the blood supply.
I am still hopeful in Tyler's case because he has some "peripheral enhancement" as well. This means that some of the tumor is dying near the surface in the middle part of it.
B~ bore his testimony in Sacrament and I bore mine in Relief Society. I have never had such a feeling before - it was almost like I was pulled up there. I have come to realize even more the importance of prayer. For a time, I was so upset with everything that was happening to me (cancer) and to Tyler (tumor0 that I stopped praying. Our family still said prayers, but I would only lie in bed and think them - it made me less and less able to handle life. It wasn't until I started praying again that the feeling of helplessness went away and the faith, hope, and strength came back. I have my Bishop to thank for this reminder.
I know that I have had unjust feelings before that our ward is very self-absorbed, but I'm beginning to realize that we are all dealing with trials and most of us are doing the best we can. Having the ward fast with us was a n amazing experience. It is wonderful to feel the support of so many people. In some ways, I hope so much that the Lord's will is my will - for his complete recovery - I don't want any of the children to think their faith and prayers are not being heard.
Showing posts with label fast. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fast. Show all posts
Sunday, February 27, 2011
January 6, 2007
I took Michelle, her friend B~, and Spielberg to the mall today. She purchased a frog Webkin - a stuffed animal that you can use to play games with on the computer.
I held Ty on my lap - I love snuggling with him - I do it every day.
Ellie is so funny - she pulled out some paper bowls from the pantry and began spreading them out and then turned them over one by one. She loves to hug you and dance with you. She always dances with one arm held out from her body, like an old fashioned slow dance.
Tonight, my Aunt M~ came and stayed with the kids so B~ and I could attend a support group for parents of deafblind children. It was a nice opportunity to visit with parents who are dealing with similar issues. We had such a good time visiting that the time away from us.
We are participating in a ward fast for Tyler. I am praying that Tyler will completely recover if it is the Lord's will and that B~ and I will know the best way to help him.
Poor Nicole, she needs some girls her age to play with. There is only one on our street. She keeps asking me to call a friend of hers that moved to Salt Lake. It will be good for her to go to Liberty Girls again and spend time with those girls.
I held Ty on my lap - I love snuggling with him - I do it every day.
Ellie is so funny - she pulled out some paper bowls from the pantry and began spreading them out and then turned them over one by one. She loves to hug you and dance with you. She always dances with one arm held out from her body, like an old fashioned slow dance.
Tonight, my Aunt M~ came and stayed with the kids so B~ and I could attend a support group for parents of deafblind children. It was a nice opportunity to visit with parents who are dealing with similar issues. We had such a good time visiting that the time away from us.
We are participating in a ward fast for Tyler. I am praying that Tyler will completely recover if it is the Lord's will and that B~ and I will know the best way to help him.
Poor Nicole, she needs some girls her age to play with. There is only one on our street. She keeps asking me to call a friend of hers that moved to Salt Lake. It will be good for her to go to Liberty Girls again and spend time with those girls.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
January 4, 2007
B~ and I have been married for 16 years today. After spending all day (7:30-4) at the hospital with Tyler, we enjoyed a nice dinner at Chili's - we even saved room for dessert. It is hard to believe that so much time has gone by.
About the hospital - we arrived at 8:30 and went to chemo so they could access his port for the IV contrast in CT. Small problem, his line had formed a clotted flap over it. They put in 40 mls of saline and couldn't get any blood back. Tyler tried to throw up twice before the CT. They finally decided it would be okay for the contrast to go through the line and sent us down for the scan. After the scan, Tyler tried to throw up three more times - it was awful. They injected TPA - a clot buster - into the line and let it sit for 30 minutes. It worked!
In the meanwhile, Tyler went through 2 pairs of pants, so B~ ran to Kmart and bought 3 more pairs of sweat pants. Most of the time we just sat there and I held and rocked Tyler.
I think he tried to throw up because he had so much volume in his stomach for the 800 mls of contrast for the CT scan. We happened to see the surgeon and he said that the tumor is bigger but that it appears the center is dying. They drew blood and since all his levels were okay, they ordered his fifth round of chemo. The tumor is now 18x16x12 ( a big difference from 10x10x6 just 12 weeks ago).
We are encouraged by this latest development. The doctors feel that it will soon begin to shrink or else it will continue to grow around the dead cells. Right now, his kidney, bowel, and bladder are functioning well enough to keep on trying chemo.
I am hopeful that the ward fast will help this tumor to shrink. Surgery is going to be a much harder option.
Oh Ty - I wish I could take it from you - all of it so you could run, play, and just be a 14 year old boy who thinks about football, basketball, skiing, and friends. I know those things aren't happiness - a family is, and ours is 16 today.
About the hospital - we arrived at 8:30 and went to chemo so they could access his port for the IV contrast in CT. Small problem, his line had formed a clotted flap over it. They put in 40 mls of saline and couldn't get any blood back. Tyler tried to throw up twice before the CT. They finally decided it would be okay for the contrast to go through the line and sent us down for the scan. After the scan, Tyler tried to throw up three more times - it was awful. They injected TPA - a clot buster - into the line and let it sit for 30 minutes. It worked!
In the meanwhile, Tyler went through 2 pairs of pants, so B~ ran to Kmart and bought 3 more pairs of sweat pants. Most of the time we just sat there and I held and rocked Tyler.
I think he tried to throw up because he had so much volume in his stomach for the 800 mls of contrast for the CT scan. We happened to see the surgeon and he said that the tumor is bigger but that it appears the center is dying. They drew blood and since all his levels were okay, they ordered his fifth round of chemo. The tumor is now 18x16x12 ( a big difference from 10x10x6 just 12 weeks ago).
We are encouraged by this latest development. The doctors feel that it will soon begin to shrink or else it will continue to grow around the dead cells. Right now, his kidney, bowel, and bladder are functioning well enough to keep on trying chemo.
I am hopeful that the ward fast will help this tumor to shrink. Surgery is going to be a much harder option.
Oh Ty - I wish I could take it from you - all of it so you could run, play, and just be a 14 year old boy who thinks about football, basketball, skiing, and friends. I know those things aren't happiness - a family is, and ours is 16 today.
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